For better or for worse.....

I am a mother. I have never carried a baby in my body or given birth. I have two little Mayan girls who hold a piece of my heart. I was their mommy for 4 wks. I don't know where they are now, but I still think of them and pray for them. Then there's the two little girls we tried to get from India, but we were not old enough. Still, I think of them and pray that God brought them loving families. There were gallons of tears and thousands of prayers. I got to the point that I felt my heart would never be the same. So much so that we decided to accept a little girl from Guatemala when the country's doors we quickly slamming shut. We accepted her at two wks old. Our hearts were shattered, but we knew this was the road God had called us to walk. We were supposed to get Mia when she was 4 months old. Absolute latest 8 months old. At 9 months old-we were told that she may never come home, things were getting bad in Guatemala. Mom and I went to Guatemala to be with her, to meet her and she stayed with us for 5 days. It was blissful! This little one slept with me, showered with me, ate with me and was my all in all for 5 days. But, God does things that we can now see were for good. At 10 months old, Mia's birth mom was called back in to make sure that she had truly wanted Mia to have a family. Because of this, we have a picture of her with her Guatemala mommy. How cool is that?! At that time we were just so upset that she was not home. Now I am glad she had that time. I still wish we could have had her as a baby, but God knew best. So all this leads me to this....perhaps in this awful-prolonged time of continuous investigation-we may know more amazing things about the days that we did not have with our two Little's in Ethiopia. Maybe-just maybe-God has something super cool up His all-knowing sleeve:) But I will leave you with this-I am a mom. These are my children. I have poured out my heart to God for them and will until I am with my Lord in heaven. These children may not look like me or have the same color of skin as I do-but don't you ever forget that God has made me their mother. To love them and to care for them. Its my privilege to care for these children. Their birth moms made the most amazing sacrifice for these children and I consider it a honor to care for them-when God so obviously has a special plan for their lives!

Okay-that's all my ramblings for the evening:) May you be blessed-A

More Prayers!

If you read this-please pray for me. Pray I would know what is Gods calling in my heart v.s. my desires. I have been wrecked by the Lord the last few weeks/months. Things I never thought of before that I feel the Lord is opening my eyes to. Things I never thought I would do but feel God is saying "GO". I am just really needing clarification for these things and could really use your prayers. Thank you!

It's another day!

So this picture is how I feel a lot of the time, but to be a example to my daughter-I refrain myself! Life has been challenging. We have sweet Mia and she is growing like a weed. The clothes I bought in Feb. for her Florida trip will probably not make it through the summer. She is so much fun and its so neat to hear her comments about the children. The other morning-she had just woke up and I was carrying her down stairs. She says to me "mommy, I love my sister Livia and I really miss her". Or I hear her praying for them as she plays through the day. She is so excited to show them her world and we are too. Its has been a long journey and for some reason it has been very hard for me. I think its the knowledge gained through our time in the country. The knowledge that these little ones have had a hard start. That we will be the 4th family that they will have. And then I have a serious problem of wanting to be in Africa so bad it hurts. I have cried so many tears for this country and the hardships of so many. I know God has called me to serve in missions. I never knew it would be so hard for me to wait to go back. I know that I am in a season of being a mommy and being needed at home. So until that day I get to go back -I wait and pray and try to be the best mommy I can be:)

May you be blessed-A

Shredded.

I have to tell you that the last few weeks have been so hard. There are just so many crazy twist and turnes going on right now with our adoption. Thursday brought more news we didnt want to hear. I cried all the way to town and back, and truly my heart just wont bounce up again. I am doing my best to hold on to the Word of God and to keep going. Trying to be happy for my family and put on a smile each day for Mia. But my heart is shredded. It hurts. I know God is in control and I know that He knew each twist and turn before it happened. I know He knew we would not get a single grant we applied for. He knew we would watch our babies turn into toddlers while they were still far away from home. He knew our visas would be twice as much as we had been told. He knows we have $1886. 52 to get to Africa and back. He also knows it cost a lot more than that and I know that He will continue to make a way and provide. He has done some amazing things on this journey and He is not done.
This week, when things were crashing down around me, I just kept thinking of Jesus. How He must have felt this week so many years ago. How He must have had such a heavy heart, knowing the suffering that was to come. But-then that 3rd day...When the world forever changed! I am so thankful that He Rose!! That He payed the price and ripped the curtain in two. That I can pour out my heart and soul to Him and know He hears every cry and even collects my tears. Praise God for the gift of a RISEN SAVIOR!!! In this I find my strength to go on and to continue through each day-knowing it will be worth it all. I pray that if you are reading this and you dont know Jesus Christ as your personal savior-that you will go to church on Sunday and hear the most awesome news ever told! He loves you so much He died for you!
May you be blesses-A

Where He leads......

I just thought I would throw this out there.....I am already thinking about our next adoption and wondering where God is going to take us. Wondering if we will be lead to another child. There are so many little ones who need some one. I cant wait to see if this is something God is going to do. I always wanted 5 kids. Yes. 5. Some may call me crazy or insane, and after each adoption I do wonder if I am crazy. But its still sitting in my mind. Still I wonder if I will be one of those moms driving a huge white van!:) Where He leads, I will follow! May you be blessed-A

April 1st

Today I was thinking of Easter. This picture is from last year:) Doesnt seem possible that its been a year since I have seen my parents-WoW! Any way, I was thinking about the ressurection of Christ and His second coming. This is something that is always on my mind right now. We are waiting for "the call" to go get our children in Ethiopia and we are also on watch for the return of Christ. Every day I think of it and I am glad for the daily reminder of all of this through our adoptions and the waiting. I hope you will take the next few weeks to prepare your hearts for Ressurection Sunday! This is the best day ever and I am so thankful that the debt I could not pay has been payed in full! May you be Blessed-A

Ethiopia-Part 2

This picture is Ethiopia. The people are so very kind and we had so much fun getting to know many of them. Their hearts amaze me. Coming from a society that is so hurried and doesn't have time for inconvenience, much of the things we saw blessed me. I am struck by how people help the beggars and the poor. How they walk arm in arm, with out worry of obnoxious sexual comments. I love that they openly show kindness for one another. To me, when we go to Ethiopia-the bible comes alive! After witnessing this culture, I can picture how the disciples sat together and reclined in Christ's embrace. Walking through Korah, I picture how it would be if Jesus came there. The crowd of needy, broken people who would show up to be healed! And I see Summer-She is the hands and feet of Jesus to these people and how they love her! The first time I went to Ethiopia, all I saw was desperation and despair. This time, I saw hope and a future. God is raising up people who love Him to do a mighty work for His Kingdom!

I cant wait to go back again! I cant wait to scoop my little blessings up and hold them knowing I will never have to leave them again. God has a great plan for them. He has done amazing things to bring these little ones to America and I cant wait to see how His story for their lives unfolds! If you would like to be a blessing to the people of Africa-you can through donations! We are collecting diapers, wipes, diaper creams and powder, formula-lactose free and non-gassy, children's vitamins and medications. If you are local- you can drop them off at Bliss Salon and Day Spa in Lafayette. If your not local-you can send them to me or send a monetary donation and we will buy the items. You can email me at ashleyskiles29@msn.com for our address. Cant wait to bless these people:)

May you be blessed-A

Ethiopia trip-part 1

Wow! The last 10 days have been crazy! We left for Ethiopia on Feb. 23rd at 6am from Indy and arrived in Ethiopia on Feb. 24th at 8:20 am. We saw two sunrises that day. We were met at the airport by sweet Bisrat and went to the Ethiopian Guest House. Same house, same room from my missions trip in July. Very nice to see familiar:) We rested up-had lunch-rested some more. Than we called the lawyer to see if we could go see the children. Thus began the crazy cycle! We were told to be at his office asap- so we were off. Crazy ride in parts of Addis that were super poor and a little creepy. Got to his office and found out that the children had never been in the orphanage that we had been told! Found out they were in a government orphanage two hours south. So after much talking and even more confusion, we were told they would bring them up and put them in a transition home. We were given a tour of this place and its nice and pretty. Very clean and calm. As far as we know that is where the kiddos will stay until we go back for them. The nannies are sweet and the lady who runs the place-she's the one in the pic- is very nice. They are working with Olivia to get her healthier and we could tell by the time we left that she was already better. Thank God. I never thought my little girl would be like one of the children I have seen in pics of malnurished African children. The skin on her arms and legs was wrinkly and hanging like a very old womans, yet her tummy was large. Londons wasnt as bad for which we are so thankful! The children are great! We are going to have so much fun and be so busy! They took a little while to warm up to us and Olivia will probably need the most work. She avoids any eye contact, cries when she see's us, and mostly tolerated us. But that is okay. We love her and we just kept telling her that and one day she will love us back:) We learned lots on this trip and met some very wonderful people. Praising God that our paths crossed with so many people who love the Lord and serve Him! I have so much more I could say, but I am getting tired again:) Jet lag is annoying! Bless each of you who lifted us in prayer. Words fail me for how much this means to us and how much we felt them! Thank you for standing by us when we needed you! We love each of you so much and I cant help but think of the reunion that heaven will be someday!

May you be blessed-A

Here we go!!

Well the time has come! We have prayed for this moment in time and it is now upon us! Our time in Addis will be spent with the children and we hope to visit Korah and the Alert Hospital. I also hope to purchase things for the children to give to them in the years to come.

Prayer request:

*Safety in travel to and from.

*Pray for the Lord to prepare our hearts and the childrens as we spend time together.

*Pray for our court on the 28th!

*Pray for Mia while we are away from each other.

*Pray that we can get a visa appointment asap:)

*Pray that God will be glorified in all that we do and pray that we can be a light for HIM to everyone we meet.

We love you all and covet each prayer as we go one this journey!

May you be blessed-A

Clean Underwear!

Do you like clean underwear? Have you ever had to wear the same underwear for a couple of days? Well lucky you-you have underwear to wear! Korah is home to thousands of people. Some of the most godly men I have ever had the priviledge of knowing call Korah home. Its a trash dump. There is destitution like I have never seen here. Its filthy, nasty, and stinks something awful! But its full of souls of boys and men who for the first time in generations are having the opportunity to hear the word of God and to see His mighty hand work in their lives. You can be part of that by simply sending me some boxers for the boys and men who call this place home. We need small, medium and large boxers and will take gently used. Leave me your email in the comments and I will send you my address.
Go beyond the call and do something-send me boxers!! Blessings-A

2.5 weeks!!

I am having a hard time believing that in 2.5 wks I will be in Ethiopia! I am so excited to meet the two sweet babies that will soon become our legal children. I am excited to go and to see this country agian and to share it with my sweet hubby. I am so looking forward to getting to know my Ethiopian friends better and to enjoy some yummy, authentic food. I have a list of things I want to do and show Brett during nap time-which is when we are not to be at the orphanage. One thing that is hard to think about is saying goodbye. I have done this before and its hard. I have prayed about staying in Ethiopia, but feel its more important to come home to be with Mia and prepare her for how our lives are going to change. So I try hard not to all ready dread that day. On to fun things-got a new double stroller. Looked long and hard and read soo many reviews. I decided on the Safari Instep. So far its been quite the entertainment for Mia who has been practicing how to push it and get her dollies in and out of the straps:) Mia amazes me. She understands so much. Today she was asking if London and Olivia where getting enough to eat. She has been very concerned for the children in Africa who are hungry and I am so glad that she has a heart for these children. I pray that we can continue to live outloud in a way that our children understand that life is not about us, but about doing the will of God and being the hands and feet of Jesus! Praying you are blessed-A

COURT DATE!!!

On March 9th 2009 we started the process of adopting one or two children from Ethiopia. We have pinched Penny's-prayed 100's if not 1000's of prayers-had fingerprints done a few times-had a few fundraisers and watched God perform so many miracles we just stand in awe of His awesomeness!!!! We got a referral on September 9th for a baby girl and a baby boy. After a short time of waiting that feels a million times longer than its actually been- we got the news! On Monday of this week I randomly decided to check my email. I had stopped checking it so often because I was driving myself cookoo. I opened my email and saw this title-court date!!! I opened it, read it. Than I read it again. That's when the shaking and sweating started. I turned around and told Brett that we could stop dieting because we were going to Africa and not Florida!!!! For the next several days I simply went crazy-didn't sleep and had a few Pepsi's:)

So Lord willing, we will be meeting our baby's on the 24th or 25th of February!!!! I simply cant believe it. God-thank you for working even when we felt like things were going no where. Thank you for answering our prayers even though it felt like they were bouncing off the ceiling. London and Olivia-I cant wait to hold you-to kiss your sweet brown skin!

You can keep the prayers rolling in. This road is not over and we still have lots to do and accomplish. God has done some amazing things and we have some really awesome things we get to take part in when we go to Ethiopia. Blessings to you all-A

God found us you!

We got our new book in the mail on Saturday. Its a sweet story of adoption called "God found us you". Mia loves it and we have read it many times already. One thing I really like about it is the way it gives openings for conversation with your little one and their story. It also has me thinking of my little ones who are so far away. One part of this book that I so love goes like this- "Did you ever give up?" Little Fox asked. "Sometimes," Mama said, rubbing Little Fox's cheek with hers. "But I trusted God knew you, and knew me, and knew when we'd fit perfectly together." So today Lord, I am trusting you know when our little ones will fit perfectly together into our family and we wait for that day! I woke up today really missing my babies. So strange since I don't really know them. Haven't had a new picture or update in months, and yet I feel I know them in a way. I pray that in 2011 more people will step out and be a forever family for the fatherless! My heart just about explodes when I talk with people and they give me all the excuses for why they cannot adopt. I know its not for everyone, but you can sponsor a child. You can go on a missions trip and hug and kiss the children. You can do SOMETHING!!! Don't forget, as a child of God, you are adopted too. God didn't make excuses about whether or not to adopt you, He didn't whine about being too old or go on about how He would no longer have time for the things He liked to do! I know-He is God, but do you get what I am saying? So what can you do this year for the little ones across the world that just want to belong? Are you willing to give up a little, so that a child will know the love of Jesus through your obedience to His call? One little girl in Uganda was in tears because we had come all the way across the ocean to hug her. She was in awe that God would do that for her. We may have went all the way to Uganda just for that sweet little girl to understand that God heard her cry and loved her enough to send a bunch of white people to Africa to give her a hug! Praying you will stand in the gap for a orphan today-A

A precious gift!

This summer I went to Africa for 14 days. While on the trip I got to know some great gals from PA. They were mom and I's roomies for the duration of the trip. Well last week mom calls me and is about to burst with with excitement, but she is all secretive and cant tell me anything. All she says is that this exciting something is coming in the mail. Everyday she asked if I got the mail. By Thursday I was kinda forgetting about it. Then it was all crazy with the new year and then the mail didnt go. So yesterday I forgot to get the mail. I got it this morning. I was saw a envelope and was excited about another christmas card. I opened it and it was not a christmas card. It was a sweet little booklet that talked about making 7000 cookies to sell over christmas to help orphans in Africa. And how on a cold-snowy day in PA they sold them all! Now these women have been busy. On facebook, Marge had talked about making tons of cookies since November! They spread the word on facebook about selling them and how they would benefit orphans in Africa. I am in Indiana just praying for these cookies to sell and for the children who would benefit from the sales. Marge and her hubby are going to Ethiopia in Febuary with Visisting Orphans and I assumed the money would go with them. Little did I know that these women were doing ALL this work for our babies!!! I opened the booklet-I read this fun little story, and then I cried! I cried because this is such a sweet thing that these women have done! Women who have only known us for not even a year yet! So many people have been used by God for this adoption, but this selfless act of giving so touched my heart! I pray that each person who participated in this cookie selling are richly blessed by the Lord! I know I have been so touched by this and I cant wait to tell London and Olivia the amazing ways God used people to help them come home to their forever family! May you be blessed-A